Adventures In Parodyverse: Complex Chaos Part 1

Adventures In Parodyverse - Complex Chaos, Part 1

    "Got a cigarette?" a man in a white Zoot Suit and a large Fedora asked Visionary as he walked past a club just outside Mangatown. It was an unusual question, both because the man who asked was dressed as if he stepped out of the Swing Era, and because he was already smoking a cigarette.

    "N-No," Visionary replied. He started walking faster. The man followed, eventually overtaking Visionary and cornering him. A few more dressed just like him seemed to appear out of nowhere as reinforcements. "Are...you going to rob me? Because I live with a teenager. I don't have any cash."

    One of the men stepped forward abruptly and offered his hand. "I'm Frankie," he said. "Seems a friend a' yours has been offerin' to protect the neighborhood for free."

    "Well--" Visionary shifted nervously. "I guess there's nothing wrong with that...is there?"

    "He's been protectin' the neighborhood from us," Frankie clarified. "Hatman is drying up my cash flow. We can't have that, understand?"

    "I'll...uh...ask him to stop?" Visionary suggested.

    "I just thought I'd leave a polite little message for him," Frankie said.

    "Uh...thanks." Visionary nodded. "I'll make sure to deliver it."

    That's when Frankie turned to the others and said, "Boys, make sure the message gets delivered, if you don't mind."

    "Wha...?" Visionary started to say, just before someone punched him in the gut. He collapsed and wheezed, and then someone else hit him on the back of the head. Somebody was laughing, but Visionary was too dizzy to figure out who it was.

    And then he heard a confident female voice say, "Why don't you boys pick on someone your own size."

    Visionary was glad for the distraction for a moment, as the beating stopped. But then he worried for the woman who decided to speak up. He tried to rise to his feet, but stumbled when he realized he was much too dizzy.

    "Breathe slow," a heavily accented voice urged him. "You will be okay."

    He looked up suddenly when he heard a scream. One of the men dressed in a Zoot Suit had his arm bent around him at an unnatural angle, held without effort by a woman much smaller than him with purple hair. She swept her arm back casually and knocked down another man who attempted to approach her at the same time. Visionary tried to rise again to help.

    "No. You stay here," the accented voice reassured him. The voice came from a Chinese teenager wearing what seemed to be a red oversized silk shirt with a white symbol on the chest and oversized matching silk pants and shoes. She anticipated his first question before he spoke it. "I am Liu Xi. You are safe."

    "Safe? With you?" Visionary asked. He cringed when he realized how insulting that sounded, and secretly hoped the teen wasn't anything like the teen he looked after, Kerry Shepherdson. He was then distracted when more of the Zoot Suited men came out of the alley exit and headed right for him. He screamed for a moment.

    The Chinese teen raised a palm flat in front of her, and in a flash of light, and suddenly her palm was touching an eight foot wall of shiny solid steel. The steel bent slowly and corralled the Zoot Suited men until they could escape only by retreating through the rear door of the club.

    "What...how did...?" Visionary started.

    "All will be explain later," Liu Xi told him. She took his hand gently and led him to the street, which was littered with unconscious Zoot Suited men and a very much conscious purple haired woman.

    "Wha...? How...?" Visionary nearly repeated himself. He finally snapped back to reality and announced, "I have to contact Hatman. Where's the nearest phone?"

    "You're going to sic the capped crusader on the Zoot Suit Gang?" an Asian woman with short dark hair and black clothing asked. She had a Japanese sword strapped to her back.

    Visionary swallowed and eyed the sword nervously. "They did kind of try to beat me up."

     "Detective Yuki beat them up in return," the woman said. "I would consider that a fair trade."

    "I'm Yuki," the purple haired woman said. "Yuki Shiro. You've met Liu Xi Xian, and this is Chiaki Bushido."

    Visionary stared at Chiaki for a moment. "The Psychic Samurai?"

    Chiaki smiled and gave a quick laugh. "I see my reputation has preceded me once again."

    "But...you're supposed to be one of Akiko Masamune's enforcers." Visionary pointed out.

    "Akiko released me from her employ," Chiaki explained. "My contract has been completed. She heard about the situation with Hatman and has asked me, as a personal favor, to make sure things were being handled fairly."

    "As you can see, it's not," Visionary winced as he touched a lump on the back of his head.

    Chiaki frowned. "I will inform them that they must behave fairly and with honor." She quietly headed inside the club.

    "This I gotta see," Yuki said, heading inside as well.

    Visionary turned to Liu Xi. "Am I the only one who thinks this is a bad idea?"

---

    Chiaki had no problem getting past the door guard inside the club. He ran for the back office as soon as she entered, as even former enforcers of Akiko Masamune carried with them quite a reputation. She headed directly to a table where Frankie was sitting with two scantily clad women, smoking and laughing with his friends.

    "Good evening," she spoke in a quiet, polite voice as she greeted him with a bow. "You will apologize to Visionary. In exchange, I will speak to Hatman personally about his fruitless crusade."

    Frankie laughed and looked at his friends. "I don't believe what I'm hearin'. Why should I apologize?"

    "It is the honorable thing to do," the Psychic Samurai told him. She kept both hands on the table as she spoke.

    One man at the end of the table stood. Before he reached his full height, the sword was drawn, he was knocked to the ground by an impact just from the handle of the sword, and the sword was returned to its sheath.

    "I await your response," Chiaki told him calmly. She looked behind her, where a very skittish Visionary was led into the club by Liu Xi.

    "Hey!" the guard suddenly called out as he left the back office. "You can't bring this kid in here!"

    "I go where I wish!" Liu Xi snapped back.

    The guard tried to approach Liu Xi and Visionary, but the floor was suddenly much too steep, and he was much too heavy. He cried out as he couldn't maintain his footing, and he slid into the back wall.

    Visionary blinked a couple of times and then rubbed his eyes, unsure of whether to trust them. But by then, the room was normal again. "I don't feel so good," he whined.

    "Do not think about it too much," Liu Xi whispered to him.

    "I'm used to being nauseated," he shrugged.

    Liu Xi suddenly giggled, and said something in Chinese which Visionary didn't understand, yet the tone of it reminded him of the type of remark that Kerry would make. While that didn't do anything to improve his mood, his spirits lifted a bit when the door opened and Hatman stepped in.

    "Well, look what the cat dragged in," Frankie commented.

    Chiaki snapped her fingers, regaining Frankie's attention. "Pay attention to me," she said. "I still await your response."

    "All right. I'll apologize." Frankie said with an amused tone. "If you can get Hatman to leave peacefully."

    The Psychic Samurai frowned. "I expect you to be a man of honor," she said. She turned and headed to intercept Hatman.

    "I think know you," Hatman said as he eyed her sword warily. "Don't you work for Akiko Masamune?"

    "I don't anymore," Chiaki replied. "Why are you here?"

    "There seems to be a lot of extortion in the neighborhood." Hatman looked directly at Frankie, who didn't seem the slightest bit concerned.

    "You must go now," Chiaki told Hatman as she stepped closer to him.

    "Huh?" Hatman frowned, confused at why she was asking him to leave.

    She gently placed a hand on Hatman's shoulder and leaned toward him, speaking in a whisper. "If you leave peacefully, Frankie of the Zoot Suit Gang will be obligated to apologize to Visionary for harming him." Hatman still seemed confused, so as she let go of his shoulder, she added, "Trust me."

    "What about the extortion?" Hatman asked.

    Chiaki didn't respond. She simply steered Hatman toward the door. He didn't resist, getting the feeling somehow that it would only make things worse. As soon as she returned, she stood in front of Frankie once again. Except this time, there were more men around him than before, waiting for her. "I expect you to honor your part of the agreement."

    "Guys," Frankie spoke to the men who had just arrived, "I think it's time this broad left my club."

    The gentle sound of steel scraping against wood was the only sound as the Psychic Samurai drew her sword. When a Samurai such as her drew her blade it meant she intended to kill. It was almost certain that someone would die...

    ...unless Hatman interrupted again. He was made entirely of steel, wearing a Steelers cap, when one of Frankie's men threw the first punch. The Zoot Suited man cried out in pain as his fist hit solid metal.

    Chiaki had her right hand held high, her sword aimed carefully downward at another Zoot Suited man approached her. Light gleamed off of the spotless polished blade as she lowered it suddenly...

    ...and a horrible screech sounded as Hatman grabbed the blade in his steel hand. He winced as the blade's sharp edge cut a shallow groove through his metallic hand.

    By that time, the quick fight had ended, as the distraction had already lasted long enough for Frankie to slip out the back door. The other men, just as they were ordered, simply fled once their leader was gone.

    Hatman removed his cap and cringed visibly as the steel scratch on his hand became a bleeding wound. He squeezed his hand shut to stem the pain and bleeding.

    Chiaki sheathed her sword quickly, looking shocked at what happened to Hatman. "Let me see," she said as she gently took his wrist and pried his hand open.

    "I'll be fine. I've had worse injuries," Hatman tried to reassure her.

    She ignored him and stole a clean napkin from a neighboring table, wrapping his hand and tightly knotting the fabric below his hand. "I'm sorry," she said. "This shouldn't have happened."

    "Yeah, that'll teach me to grab a sword," Hatman joked.

    Chiaki smiled briefly. "I owe you a debt, Hatman," she told him. "You were wounded trying to preserve my life and my enemies'. It was an honorable thing to do. One day I hope to repay you."

    "Not necessary," Hatman waved off the suggestion.

    "It is necessary," she told him. "It is my way."

    The two of them looked over as they saw Yuki with her purple hair approach. "I missed the entire thing, didn't I?" she asked. She looked at Hatman's hand. "Jay, did you pick a fight with her?"

    "Secret-ae ID-ae," Hatman butchered pig latin with his teeth clenched to try and get his point across.

    "She knows," Yuki explained. "She's not called the Psychic Samurai for nothing. In fact, if I recall she likes using her talents to scare people. Like asking me how Al B Harper is doing even though she's never met him."

    "How is Al B Harper doing?" Hatman asked.

    Yuki rolled her eyes. "He's fine, recuperating. He tried to hook some sort of dimensional generator to Liu Xi to see if he figure out how to do what she does, and he ended up seeing the internals of the universe or something. He's been tossing his cookies all morning. I guess I would be too if I wasn't being used as a digital controller, sitting where I couldn't see anything."

    Hatman dismissed the entire notion, being unable to come up with a single frame of reference. "It was nice to meet you two again," he said. He held his napkin bandaged hand up and looked at Chiaki. "Thank you for the bandage work," he said.

    Chiaki gave him a slight bow. "I suppose you have places to go. Perhaps we'll meet again soon."

    "Till then." Hatman returned the bow and switched to his Jets cap as he headed outside.

---

    When Yuki and Chiaki arrived outside, they found Visionary lying down in the back seat of Yuki's car, sweating and looking like he had just passed out. As she opened the rear car door, Yuki narrowed her eyes and looked at Liu Xi. "What did you do?" she asked.

    "Old car try to run over him leaving club," she said. She smiled slightly as she added, "Car passed right through him."

    "Oh." Yuki rolled her eyes. She leaned inside and slapped Visionary's cheek gently. "Wake up!" she ordered.

    "Dammit Kerry," he mumbled, eyes still closed, "I don't have any more cash."

    "Is he for real?" Yuki asked Chiaki.

    That finally caused Visionary to sit up suddenly and say with as much indignation as he could muster, "I'm real, dammit!"

    "Oookay," Yuki dismissed him with. She then moved on to, "Are you going to be all right?"

    He nodded quickly, and looked at Liu Xi, who seemed a little concerned at having scared him so much. "It's okay, Liu Xi. At least you didn't set me on fire yet."

    Liu Xi giggled and sat back in the seat, finally feeling better about herself.

    "Anywhere I can drop you off?" Yuki asked Visionary. She then looked at Chiaki and added, "And you?"

    "I'd like to go to the Lair Mansion," Visionary said. "No one will set fire to me there either. At least not at first."

    Chiaki pondered the question for a moment. "No thank you," she said, "I will find my own way."

    Yuki shrugged and climbed into the driver's seat. "Suit yourself."

    Chiaki opened the rear door for a moment and leaned inside to speak to Visionary. "You did a brave thing today, Visionary. In the midst of all these battles you kept Liu Xi protected and out of danger."

    "I did, didn't I?" Visionary smiled, feeling a little better. Just as she closed the door, his smile disappeared. "How did she know my name?"

    "She is Psychic Samurai," Liu Xi told him.

    "Oh." Visionary mumbled. He didn't bother to ask the obvious question, being unsure he wanted to know the answer.

TO BE CONTINUED?

-- Story written and copyrighted (C) 2005 by Jason Froikin, and may not be
-- reprinted without permission.
-- Yuki Shiro designed by Jason Froikin, based on designs by Masamune Shirow
-- Liu Xi Xian is an original design by Jason Froikin

Post By Anime Jason Sat Jan 29, 2005 at 12:26:26 pm EST	Subject Adventures In Parodyverse: Complex Chaos Part 1

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